A psychologist at the Department of Neonatal Surgery and Medicine at Rome's Bambino Gesù Hospital, Lucia Aite gathers in this book the stories of parents whose newborns underwent major surgery in their first days of life—surgery made necessary by congenital anomalies diagnosed during pregnancy or at birth.
Day after day, Aite witnessed the suffering of sedated and immobilized infants and the anguish of parents watching their children surrounded by monitors, IV lines, and feeding tubes. She began to ask herself: How could she give voice to that newborn—to what he was living through, his need for touch and attention? How could she help his parents bond with him? The answer came as a fairy tale. A story that would offer words parents could recognize themselves in, words that might show them new ways to live the difficult reality they were facing. Through this tale, a dialogue opened between Aite and the parents. For the first time, sitting beside their child's crib, they found space and time to tell their own stories—each one separately, reaching back to the moment they first learned of the pregnancy. In that telling, they rediscovered themselves as people. They made contact with what they had lived through. They named their own emotions.
This act of narration—of making sense of experience—held enormous power. For the parents, it made what they were enduring more bearable. For the child, it meant his parents would feel closer to him; one day, he could read his own story and recognize himself in it. For the medical staff surrounding this family, it opened a window into the parents' inner world, confirming some of what they observed and deepening their understanding of others.
The book's eleven chapters each address themes central to such experiences: the emotional impact of prenatal diagnosis, difficult decisions, scheduled delivery, paternal care, relationships with other parents, loss, coming home. Each chapter opens with Aite's reflection and a parent's story. This is a precious book for anyone with the strength to approach experiences so overwhelming and intense—for those who understand the power of speaking about such pain, and for those seeking companions on a journey through storms like these.