A Child Who Helps Us Grow
It is hard to sum up in a few lines the events that led us to welcome Francesco, or to capture the feelings, emotions, questions, satisfactions, and worries that have come with this experience.
What we do know is that certain things we lived through, certain moments that seemed insignificant or mere coincidence at first, turned out to be linked by a thread that has been guiding our story.
Two factors were crucial to Francesco's adoption:
- A bond, now lasting several years, between our parish community and the Tau community in Arcene — a bond built on hospitality, closeness, friendship, and simple gestures of shared care;
- The desire in our family — from us as parents — to open ourselves outward and share what we had received, to offer other children, without any presumption, the fruit of our experience as parents. This desire met with the proposal from our four children, especially our oldest, that we care for a child from the Tau community.
So in mid-July, Francesco arrived in our family: a tiny bundle of a few months old, and a few extra pounds, an extra chromosome, and a small heart condition.
Francesco is a very sweet child, affectionate, eager to be loved, with curious eyes that follow everything and everyone. He is truly good — he sleeps through the night! — and loves being held. For us, he is already a full member of the family, and the grandmothers are besotted with him.
Yes, Francesco has changed our daily rhythms and habits. There are some challenges, normal enough when making room — physical and otherwise — for a new arrival, and some health concerns.
But Francesco is repaying us richly with his affection, and he is helping all of us grow, both as individuals and as a family.
Through his needs, he teaches us a different relationship with time. He teaches us to stop and notice the essentials of life.
He is teaching us to trust God and the people around us, to have hope for the future.
We were used to a fully scheduled day; now Francesco is teaching us to accept the unexpected, the inconvenient.
He is helping our children become more responsible, more aware of their place in family life, each with their own gifts and temperament. Our youngest, for instance, dances Latin rhythms next to his crib when it is time for him to wake for his feeding.
Francesco is truly a precious gift to our family and to the community we live in!
Francesco's family
My Story
Perhaps I was a bit too aggressive (see "First Division and Second Division" on page 3 of Ombre e Luci no. 2-2002), and you, kind and understanding, asked me to share my testimony. I could send many installments of stories from my life: from the birth of my twin daughters — now forty years old, born prematurely, unable to eat, until a nun in the hospital ward told me, "You know, you must be prepared at any moment to lose those two" — to the difficult birth of Francesca and her early childhood. We went to various doctors, to healers, and so on.
For many years I was supported by my husband, who had an exceptional character: calm, always ready to interpret even negative statements in the best way. Then came the heaviest blow. Two years ago, one evening, he began to feel severe pain, and in just over two hours — from an aortic aneurysm — he was gone. I still cannot describe the emptiness he left in our entire family, or the despair that fell upon Francesca, already so burdened by her physical condition.
Now we are working toward a group home that should become operational in the next two years. If any details of these experiences interest you, you need only ask, and I, letter after letter, will write gladly, even at the cost of reliving painful episodes.
Gabriella Grossi
Guardian Angels
Dear friends,
I am reading a fine book of meditations by Anselm Grün, based on twenty-five biblical episodes in which angels are active. He offers a psychological interpretation of them, and the reflections that emerge are very interesting.
I think they could help even those who may not have much faith in God, but who know how to look for the positive side of things and know that even in the darkest situations there is a ray of hope.
Why am I bringing this up?
Because we all live through situations where we experience our limits: a misunderstanding, a friendship broken that we cannot mend; suffering we cannot console; a child growing up and causing us worry; a responsibility that weighs too heavily; a friend far away. So why not think that where we cannot reach, an angel can? And we entrust that situation to the angel. It is an injection of confidence! So I would like to pray that the Lord's angel is always near each of you, protecting you from all harm, giving you peace and joy, keeping us united in communion.
(From the Fede e Luce electronic bulletin, no. 91).
Fr. Enrico Cattaneo
He Gave Me Back the Joy of Living
Matteo is a seventeen-year-old boy with Williams syndrome.
He is very affectionate, sociable, and innocent. He knows nothing of malice or cruelty and is incapable of negative feelings.
He has a twin sister, Ilaria, who is a constant source of inspiration for him and who, by allowing him to imitate her, has helped him reach important milestones.
Two years ago, a director chose him to participate in a theatrical performance: "The Love of Three Oranges," and to my great surprise, he participated with tremendous dedication and seriousness. Opening night at the Teatro Argentina was fantastic!
I want to emphasize his perseverance, because Matteo usually starts things but then tires and does not finish them — or rather, would not want to, but I push him to continue.
The theater experience helped him grow. It showed him that if he wants to, he can do anything. It gave him confidence in himself and opened the door to new friendships. For the first time, he did not need my encouragement to complete a project.
Then came the unexpected. The theater company was invited to Australia for an international theater festival. Matteo had never flown, and my fear was that such a long journey would upset him for the first time. Instead, once again he surprised me. Excited and happy, he faced this adventure with a disarming enthusiasm and serenity.
The success in Australia was tremendous. Matteo met various personalities who were struck by his sociability and talkativeness. Over the past two years, he has continued this experience through a theater workshop at school, and last May he performed in "A Midsummer Night's Dream."
At first I felt like an unlucky mother, but over time I came to understand that having Matteo was the most beautiful thing that could have happened to me. He gave me back the joy of living. His sensitivity taught me how beautiful a sunset is, how beautiful a flower is, and all the small things of life that I had stopped noticing.
Matteo's mother