This is a manual written first and foremost for parents. It is also a proposal for close collaboration between parents and professionals. Finally, it is a book that offers no miraculous cures, but rather aims to improve the quality of life for the entire family.
Throughout its chapters, the author forgoes abstract theories and instead reflects on the real difficulties faced by families with autistic children: repetitive behaviors, communication, play and leisure time, aggression, hygiene, meals, sleep. Each chapter begins with a brief description of the challenge at hand, then offers a series of short stories from parents who have managed, through simple and practical means, to overcome common obstacles in daily life.
Here are some examples:
When aggression toward others stems from frustration:
"My five-year-old daughter Card was often frustrated and would hit and strike other people, including classmates and teachers. At home we could understand what she wanted, but people outside the family could not. So I convinced the school staff to stop thinking that Card was deliberately being bad and to make an effort to teach her sign language so she could communicate her wishes and needs to others more appropriately. Card learned 300 signs in six months, and her level of frustration and aggression decreased significantly."
A strategy for stopping self-head-hitting
"My seven-year-old son Michel, who hits his head, attends a public school. The school has three twenty-minute recess periods a day. These periods were completely unstructured, and the children were left on their own. My son spent the time flapping his hands and hitting his head. Not only did this fail to help him appear more normal, but it made the other children think he was a strange kid to be avoided. We insisted that the school organize structured activities for him during recess. He stopped hitting himself and began to behave more normally."
Another strategy concerning pinching behavior:
"My fourteen-year-old daughter Eunice, when she becomes agitated, wants to pinch people. Her teacher gave her a bag of beans to pinch. Now she directs that behavior toward the bag instead of toward people."
Something had to be done to get Martin to stop spitting in people's faces!
"Something had to be done to get Martin to stop spitting in people's faces. We worked together with his teacher to reach this goal, but nothing worked until we all agreed that every time he spit, we would spray water in his face. His teacher did the same at school. Once Martin discovered what it felt like, he stopped spitting."
One mother's effort to keep her child at the dinner table:
"Sally, five years old, was always leaving the table. She didn't want to sit still without doing anything for long. At meals she would take a bite and run off, then come back for another bite, and so on. Scolding her was unpleasant for the whole family. I started making a big gesture at the end of our meals and saying, 'We're done!' while putting the plate in the sink. I did the same thing with the other children as soon as they got up: 'Oh, you're finished!' Then I started doing the same with Sally's plate as soon as she got up, even if it was full. She seemed horrified and very unhappy, but it worked."
How to help children understand rules:
"My son Dick used to have a crisis every time we stopped the car at a stop sign. He liked to look out the window while the car was moving and watch everything passing through his field of vision. We took him out on foot and showed him what a stop sign was and what it meant. He learned to look at the stop signs, to wait, and then to cross the street. Now he can travel with us in the car and wait patiently when we stop at a traffic light."
The methodology described in the book is based on common sense and parental experience, as well as the TEACH method.
In the Italian edition there is, among other pieces, a very engaging text written by a psychologist responsible for autistic individuals at a health service in Milan. The text is titled "Improving Quality of Life"—already a worthwhile program in itself.
- Eric Schopler, 1999