When Matteo was born, they told us he was a bit underweight, but we weren't worried—his two older sisters had been the same way at birth, and they were perfectly healthy (and both have university degrees now). The next day, the clinic called me in. They sat down with my wife Luisa and me and told us Matteo had Down syndrome. It was a heavy blow, I won't lie. But we were immediately surrounded by specialists, a social worker, and someone from the Parents of Children with Down Syndrome Association. With all their help, we came to terms with it fairly quickly. Not every train is an express, we told ourselves—some are local trains that go slowly, and Matteo would be one of those.
Thanks to all that support, I didn't struggle to understand that Matteo was different, or to talk about it calmly with Luisa—even about the future.
At the time, we were part of a family group at our parish. We talked about Matteo openly with those friends from the start. They were true friends—they welcomed him without reservation.
Through the Parents Association, I got to know other fathers with Down syndrome children. But I found it hard to talk about Matteo there, or anywhere else, because almost all the other kids had additional, sometimes serious health conditions—heart problems, vision problems, and so on. Matteo was completely healthy, so we felt enormously lucky compared to them. (We ended up leaving the association—it was too far from home.)
I can't say I was disappointed by Matteo's birth. From the very start, he's been so... sunny in his nature (and still is) that being with him is easy and deeply fulfilling for me.
as told to Sergio de Rino, 2005
